This sunny afternoon, I sobbed in my sweet son's arms. Allowing the young man I am proud to have already raised so well; hold me, and embrace the inner child within the Mother that is able to relinquish control. Sharing my concern while the taste of fear was still fresh in my immediate memory. After a dream of us fighting and me locking him out of our home. Raw and all too real.
It was when Kaelin arrived a mere 15 minutes late from his promised time of arrival back at our suite, today, that the dreaded feeling came over me. If it were not for the deafening dream that still rang harshly in my ears and caused me heart to ache, I would easily have forgotten and forgiven. Yet, after purging myself of many old emotions, after writing last night's very brave and revealing blog, I was aware that so called reality may just be a vulnerable place to live within, for a wee while anyway ...
Rather than chide myself for not being the 'perfect parent' whom constantly supervises with due diligence and hypervigilence, I surrendered to my growing boy's instinctinctive need to nurture the Mother whom has so freely fostered love, compassion and devotion within him, for the past decade and divinely counting. What a relief to let go and feel the heart I grew inside of me, beating soundly, on the outside, as a healthy and healing reminder of all I am and forever shall be.
With Truth and Tenderness,
Katherine
www.youtube.com/lifeofagreatmommy
P.S.
Please feel free to post your positive commentary. I generously share so many of my emotions with a world I often never have the opportunity to see or hear. Thus, all the more meaningful ...
It was when Kaelin arrived a mere 15 minutes late from his promised time of arrival back at our suite, today, that the dreaded feeling came over me. If it were not for the deafening dream that still rang harshly in my ears and caused me heart to ache, I would easily have forgotten and forgiven. Yet, after purging myself of many old emotions, after writing last night's very brave and revealing blog, I was aware that so called reality may just be a vulnerable place to live within, for a wee while anyway ...
Rather than chide myself for not being the 'perfect parent' whom constantly supervises with due diligence and hypervigilence, I surrendered to my growing boy's instinctinctive need to nurture the Mother whom has so freely fostered love, compassion and devotion within him, for the past decade and divinely counting. What a relief to let go and feel the heart I grew inside of me, beating soundly, on the outside, as a healthy and healing reminder of all I am and forever shall be.
With Truth and Tenderness,
Katherine
www.youtube.com/lifeofagreatmommy
P.S.
Please feel free to post your positive commentary. I generously share so many of my emotions with a world I often never have the opportunity to see or hear. Thus, all the more meaningful ...
A child at the age of 13/14 should not have dead eyes like that. What have you done to him? YOU MONSTER!
ReplyDeleteone more sick puppy ..
ReplyDeletejealousy is an awful crime - against love.
Powerful is the heart that listens to its own,
Loving mine